If you’re a soon-to-be-married couple out there eager to plan your wedding, you’ve probably already run into several conversations about the type of wedding you’ll have. Will it be a big wedding with a large guest list? A smaller, more intimate event? What about something just for you two–maybe a secluded elopement only including a few guests to stand by your side?
There are endless possibilities when it comes to getting married these days. As a creative vendor in the wedding industry, I’m thrilled to pieces when I see new, exciting categories for weddings. It feels like every time I turn around, there’s a new option that fits a couple best.
Still, with the evolving world of weddings, trying to decide on what kind of wedding can feel overwhelming. If you find yourself stuck between the lines of categories and uncertain of what’s right for you, that choice can be tough!
The best way to decide on–and plan–the type of wedding that’s right for you? Understanding what each category of wedding could mean for your day.
As a luxury micro wedding and elopement photographer, I can talk all day about the benefits of these types of weddings. That doesn’t make me biased against a bigger, more traditional style wedding though.
I wholly believe that every style of wedding is the right choice for someone out there. The best way to make sure you’re picking the day that makes you happiest is to understand your options.
The biggest takeaway I want you to have after reading this blog? There’s no hard and fast rule about how to get married.
The right way to say yes to the love of your life is the way that makes you feel happiest, most aligned, and most alive on your wedding day.
Pictured: Seaplane micro wedding in the San Juan Islands, Washington.
I want to start this by saying that even though I’m breaking this down into three styles of weddings, there are so many more categories than just these!
In between the labels of big weddings, micro weddings, and elopements lie mini-categories that cover all kinds of weddings. And there are even more categories inside those categories, too.
I imagine weddings will always be categorized into unique boxes with new trends popping up with each passing year.
That’s the beautiful thing about weddings, honestly–they’re truly up to you and don’t require coloring inside the lines. If the category of wedding you’re seeking isn’t out there, there’s no reason you can’t create it.
Pictured: An unique micro wedding ceremony set up at the Hanai Center in Bend, Oregon.
People used to view big weddings as more traditional, larger events held in event halls, ballrooms, or churches–spaces large enough to accommodate a guest list of anywhere from 100–200 people.
Over the years, big weddings have shifted and evolved. They’re still set up for larger guest lists, but they’re not as straightforward as they used to be.
Big weddings are a chance to incorporate a ton of creativity, multi-day events, unique locations, and talented, creative vendors – all without sacrificing your guest list.
Pictured: Brides celebrating after their micro wedding ceremony at Hanai Center in Bend, Oregon.
Larger weddings are a great option for couples who have large, extended families or big friend groups and prioritize including all their loved ones on their wedding day.
Choosing a big wedding means choosing to prioritize including your guests over other elements of your day, like the possibility of a smaller, more intimate venue.
Often–not always–these kinds of weddings feel like the perfect fit for couples who enjoy throwing a large party and spending that time with all of their people.
When it comes to allocating your budget for a bigger wedding, your guests and their accommodations (food, drinks, favors, etc.) will eat up a portion of the budget that a smaller wedding wouldn’t. Which makes sense, right? The more people you invite, the more of your budget should be allocated toward the guest list.
This is neither good nor bad; it’s just an inherent element of hosting a big wedding. For some couples, the opportunity to host a party of their design and include their favorite people (without having to compromise on who can come and who can’t) is the ultimate expression of alignment on their wedding day.
Pictured: A micro wedding ceremony at a cliffside location in Moab, Utah.
A micro wedding is an intimate wedding where you gather your closest people–loved ones, family, and friends–for a day that aligns with your vision of love, acceptance, experience, and support.
Picture a wedding that embodies some of the elements a big wedding has but on a smaller, more intimate scale. A micro-wedding is like a big wedding but with a guest list of about 20-60 people. You’re still involving your loved ones, but a pared-down list of your closest people. Because the guest list is smaller, you usually have a little more room in your budget to splurge on vendors, venues, and experiences.
Most importantly, a luxury micro wedding (like an elopement) places more emphasis on quality than it does on quantity. There’s more flexibility in planning and budget, and often, because the guest list is smaller, it’s less stressful for a couple during the planning process.
A micro wedding comes with a little less expectation than a big wedding from a guest perspective, too. A big wedding tends to pull focus away from the desires of the couple naturally–because there are more people invited, the focus becomes a bit more on what the guests will experience.
With a micro wedding (fewer guests and a different mindset), it’s easier to stay true to a vision that centers more around the couple and what their vision of a perfect day feels and looks like.
It’s also easier and more seamless to spend quality and intentional time with each guest when the guest list is smaller.
Pictured: The first dance following their sunset cliff side micro wedding ceremony.
Within the micro wedding category lives a whole host of other types of weddings. A micro wedding can be anything. It can be a destination event in Italy on Lake Como or an island off Thailand, or it could be a multi-day luxury micro wedding experience with 30 of your closest people in the mountain town you adore.
A micro wedding gives you the flexibility and opportunity to focus on a specific, curated experience for your wedding, an intentional guest list, and a creative focus on quality of vendors and venues. You have the freedom to be more out of the box with your wedding day(s) when you choose this route.
Pictured: A couple eloping on the cliffs of Crook Point on the southern Oregon Coast.
Just like a micro wedding, elopements place an emphasis on the quality of experience over the quantity of guests. Typically, an elopement guest list will range from 0 to 10 guests, and the experience of the day is primarily focused on the couples’ desires, followed by guest experience (if there are any guests at all).
Eloping used to be a spontaneous event–something couples did at courthouses or in Vegas. And while these are still popular and exciting ways to elope, this type of wedding has seen its fair share of expansion in the last few years.
Just like micro-weddings, elopements prioritize the couple’s intentions and experiences over expectations often associated with a big wedding. This is translated in so many different ways, but typically, it’s embodied in the couples’ choices of activities, venues, vendors, outfits, attitudes, and ceremony structure.
Pictured: A couple exploring seas side cliffs at sunset on their elopement day.
Just like every other wedding category, there are tons of subcategories within the elopement world.
Some of the most common are fast-paced, spontaneous elopements (like in a courthouse or in Vegas), adventure elopements (which really took off in 2015-2016 and continue to grow in popularity), and luxury elopements (a more elevated, destination-esque approach to eloping).
The name of the game with elopements is quality of experience over quantity of guests–and that can express itself in so many different ways.
For some couples, an elopement is an opportunity to eat the best food and enjoy top-notch experiences in a destination they’ve dreamed of going to. For others, it’s about investing in creative vendors who can level up the aesthetics and experiences of their day. And still, for others, it’s all about choosing the vendor, venue, and experience that allows them to be the most relaxed and aligned version of themselves possible on their wedding day.
Pictured: A couple boarding their private seaplane in the San Juan Islands, Washington, on their micro wedding day.
Whether you’re choosing to say your vows in front of your 100 closest people in a stunning hall or whisper your I Dos just to your partner over the gentle wind on a mountain peak, you’re going to want to remember how that moment felt.
No matter what kind of wedding you choose–a big wedding with all the guests, a small, just-us style elopement, or something in between like Whitney + Levi’s small wedding elopement hybrid–I encourage you to prioritize documenting your day with photos, videos, and anything that can help you connect with the memories of how that day felt.
If you’re seeking a micro wedding or elopement photographer who can help you document how every moment felt, here’s a gentle nudge to take a peek at my work and connect with me about questions, ideas, and capturing your beautiful wedding day moments.